


Maybe this time we'll succeed

by SamanthaSepopaSandile



Series: A beautiful accident [3]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Adultery, Badass child lexa, But not by our babies, CEO Lexa (The 100), Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, F/F, F/M, Half-Siblings, Hurt/Comfort, I Don't Even Know, Lexa Has a Penis (The 100), Light Angst, M/M, Madi and Ontari are sisters but half siblings with Lexa, Married Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Not beta'd so all mistakes are my own, Posh child Lexa, Teenage Parents
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-05
Updated: 2021-02-01
Packaged: 2021-03-15 21:21:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 14,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28570689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SamanthaSepopaSandile/pseuds/SamanthaSepopaSandile
Summary: Clarke and Lexa are about to start a new chapter of their lives when a knock on the door throws a wrench in the plan at work. An event neither of them anticipated is coming to fruition and they must learn how to navigate this new terrain together without falling apart at the seams.The last and final chapter of their story unfolds.
Relationships: Anya/Raven Reyes, Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Emori/John Murphy (The 100), Jasper Jordan/Maya Vie, Monty Green/Original Character(s), Octavia Blake/Lincoln
Series: A beautiful accident [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1761541
Comments: 81
Kudos: 271





	1. The end is just the beginning

**Author's Note:**

> Okay let me completely honest, this story has been a bitch in the works. Every goddamn chapter just melts my brain while writing and wow have I been humbled.
> 
> This one might be a longer book, because the mistake I made was trying to give it the life I wanted for it when really it's a teenager now and all it does is revolt. 
> 
> So in conclusion, this story will have a life of its own. And the first few chapters are prewritten so the tone might completely change at some point, I don't know.
> 
> Comments are always welcome, suggestions of what you'd like to see and really with how this is going you might possibly get your suggestion in a chapter. I'm trying to be more lax with my writing anyway so, a win win really. Hopefully.😂
> 
> I also wanted to thank you for all the messages, I got them and they give me life. And also I apologise for making you wait this long, but without further ado... Enjoy

Part Three

Chapter 1.3

"Baby are you ready yet?" Lexa knocked.

"Almost!" The answering yell said.

"You're going to be late!" She answered back.

"No one will even care babe." Clarke answered, opening the door.

"Well I do, and fuck you look delicious." The brunette commented eying the dress her wife was wearing. A black silk dress with a sweetheart neckline, tight around her waist and flowing from her hips to right above her knees.

"Why thank you baby, but I don't wanna be late." She answered, kissing her quickly.

"Mama!" Micah wobbled to them falling into Clarke's legs. The girl had started walking a few weeks prior but still unsteady, the blonde thought she looked like an adorable penguin.

"Hi baby" she cooed reaching down and picking her up.

"My Goodness you look gorgeous." Abby said gently, having reached them, running behind her granddaughter.

"Thank you Mom" she smiled gently, pulling the older woman into a hug.

"Babe we've gotta go." Lexa interrupted.

"Pictures first!" Abby said.

"Mom come on. Is this really necessary." She whined.

"Of course it is, it's your graduation! I need pictures, Clarke. Pictures! I'm getting old, I'm not going to remember how gorgeous my daughter and daughter in-law looked on her graduation day. This is a big day for me!" She exclaimed, pushing them together into a pose.

She grabbed her phone and started snapping pictures while Clarke just laughed and rolled her eyes.

Soon after that, Clarke grabbed her graduation gown and out the door they headed. Buckling Micah into her seat and all of them getting comfortable Lexa took off and towards the school.

~~~~

When they got there Clarke was pulled into a group hug by the delinquents. All of which proceeded to fawn and fuss over Micah who seemed to be thoroughly enjoying the attention she got for a minute before she got annoyed at being passed around.

A few of Clarke's former classmates came around to greet her and saw the little girl.

"Awww, she's so cute" Jane from homeroom said, cooing at Micah.

"Her name's Micah." Clarke spoke up, rocking the girl in her arms.

"Is she yours?" Julia, the girl she was with asked.

"Yeah, she-" 

"Mama!" Micah interrupted.

Jane and Julia looked shocked.

"Mama!" The little girl bounced reaching back.

"Hi my little angel." Lexa walked behind Clarke.

The girl leaned to her and Clarke passed her off. Smiling.

The girls looked confused for a moment.

"Oh guys, this is my wife. Lexa." Clarke introduced.

"Oh" Julia let out.

"Babe, this is Julia and Jane. They were in my homeroom." She looked towards Lexa who smiled gently.

"Hey, it's nice to meet you." Lexa said, politely.

"Oh Hi" Jane said and then to Clarke, "I didn't know you were married."

Clarke shrugged.

"Or that you had such a cute little girl" Julia added.

Before their small talk could really develop into something lengthy, the Master of Ceremony called for everyone to take their seats for the program to begin.

The graduation ceremony was over before they even truly got to enjoy it. But they were mostly looking forward to the after party, than the ceremony itself. Though Clarke and the delinquents had their own after party planned, she liked to think it would be just as fun, if not more, than the one the school was throwing. Though no one ever really attended that one if they had a choice. And they wouldn't be, because they had a choice.

The crew would be hanging out at her house, which was obviously what was going to happen, since they absolutely loved being at her place with how spacious and luxurious it was. Plus she really didn't want to leave her family at such a pivotal moment in her life. Especially since she owed a lot of her success to her wife. Thus she wanted to celebrate her success with her.

Lexa drove them home with the sole intention of showing her wife just how proud of her she was. And show her she did, pinned against the bedroom door, graduation gown hiked up to her waist and cap thrown haphazardly around the room. Then again pinned face flat against the bed, bent over the edge. Then one last time, slow and gently and oh so lovingly in the shower afterwards. 

They stole kisses while they got ready and bumped into each other lovingly, sharing secret smiles. When they walked out, absolutely glowing because let's be honest three orgasms do that to a person, they found Abby setting up the backyard for the get together. She watched them step out through the glass sliding door with a knowing smirk and Clarke found herself blushing a shade of red that she had never thought she could turn.

They weren't particularly quiet.

In her defence no one could be even partly quiet with the way Lexa was pounding into her like a woman on a mission. No amount of soundproofing could quieten her screams. Not that they'd ever had to worry about that before, that is up until her mother moved in it seems.

~~~~

The doorbell rang a moment later, sending a notification to her phone because they were all outside and couldn't really hear it that well. Without checking Clarke turned around and ran off trying to hide from her mother's knowing smirk.

Assuming it was one of her friends Clarke pulled the door open with a happy smile only for it to fall a beat later when her eyes landed on her father. She frowned, eyes hardening.

"What do you want?" She bit out coldly and Jake flinched before straightening himself up.

"Congratulations!" He said smiling brightly. He put his arm out, in his hand was a blue gift bag with pink paper sticking out.

Clarke eyed it, scowled and eyed her father. Not making any move towards the package and not saying anything. Just staring at the man in front of her. 

"What do you want?" Clarke repeated. Ignoring his outstretched arm and the gift it bore.

Jake slowly lowered his arm, frowning. He lifted his other arm and rubbed the back of his neck.

"I- I wanted to see you." He said.

"Why?" She asked cooly.

"Because it's my daughter's graduation day and I wanted to be there to support her. I know I have no right-" he was cut off.

"Yeah, you're right. You do have no right." She stepped back, unfolded her arms and reached for the door. 

"Clarke! Clarke please wai-" she shut the door in his face and locked it.

She walked a few paces into the house before collapsing to the floor. She couldn't breathe, she hadn't noticed the tingling sensation of an ensuing panic attack until now. So wrapped in her rage she hadn't felt it.

Suddenly she felt arms wrap around her and a soothing voice gently coax her back to reality.

"Hey baby" Lexa whispered to her when her panic attack had been calmed.

"Hey" Clarke croaked.

Lexa carried her into her arms bridal style and took her to their room. Climbing up the two steps that lead to their bed she lays her down and lays down with her. Pulling the girls head into her chest and cuddling her.

"What happened baby?" She asked gently, when the blonde had calmed down.

"My dad was at the door" she said, Lexa hummed non commitaly but said nothing.  
"He came to say congratulations. After all he has done Lexa, he pops by and thinks it's okay and I'll just accept his gifts. After all the pain he's caused. I was so angry. So so angry that I couldn't do anything about it but cry. Then suddenly I couldn't breathe. I've never had a panic attack before now." Tears spring in her eyes again and her voice cracked in the last sentence.

"Hey baby, shh. It's okay. You're okay." She soothed her.

"Sometimes I feel like this is all my fault. Maybe if I hadn't come back none of this would have happened. Maybe if we had been more careful…" then she shook her head.

"Then we wouldn't have Micah and we wouldn't have this life. You would be in college and I would be running a company. We would have fallen apart sooner than you could say what if. Your dad might have still done the same thing he did and maybe he wouldn't have because he wouldn't have the opportunity. 

You can't keep living by what if Clarke. And you can't keep dwelling on the past. It shapes us, makes us who we are but if we stay in it, it could destroy us, our present and our future." She says sternly. 

It stung a bit thinking that Clarke might regret them, or might be blaming her for her father but she knows her wife didn't mean it like that. She was just trying to voice her thoughts, not necessarily that she thought that it was Lexa's fault.

"Oh baby, I didn't mean it that way…" Clarke pushed herself up with her arm and looked down onto Lexa's glistening eyes. 

"Then how did you mean it Clarke? Because essentially you're right, it would be my fault if you looked at it that way." She sniffled.

This topic was still such a sore subject for her wife. She still felt so guilty for getting Clarke pregnant, even if it was a mistake, and the blonde knew it. Sometimes she has to reassure her wife that it wasn't her fault. It wasn't intentional and that since then she's made up for it in so many ways. And that she doesn't regret it. Of course Lexa has been seeing their therapist about it, the same therapist she's been attending since finding out about her father. She's gotten a lot better but sometimes she has her moments.

"I love you so much. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it that way." She said gently wiping at her wife's tears.

"I know. I'm sorry. You must be so tired of having to reassure me all the time. I know that's not how you meant it. I know you were just trying to express yourself and your thoughts and emotions and I'm sorry I got touchy about it and made you feel guilty for sharing." She sniffled once more, grabbing the hand her wife had placed against her cheek melting into it.

"It's okay. I made it sound like I regret us. Which I don't. I just can't help but wonder what life would be like if I'd never gotten pregnant." She leaned down and placed her forehead against her wife's.

"Dull most probably" Lexa joked.

"Oh definitely." A wet chuckle escaped her throat.

A knock sounded at their door and they broke apart to stare at the intruding figure. At the doorway stood Abby with a crying Micah in her arms. Someone clearly not having woken up happy from her nap.

"Come in." Lexa motioned for them.

Clarke sat up straight and opened her arms for her mom to drop the crying baby into her arms. She swang gently with the girl tucked into her shoulder and began humming.

"Has anyone arrived yet?" Lexa asked Abby.

"Yeah. They're in the backyard," she said cautiously. Eying the blonde with concern in her eyes. 

Lexa tried her best to convey that everything was alright through her eyes. Abby seemed to understand and nodded once before turning around to leave.

She sighed and went out to entertain their guests. Clarke followed a few minutes later carrying a sleepy Micah, all remnants of the panic attack she'd had gone.

~~~~~

They enjoyed the rest of their day with their friends. Micah went down for another nap because she was being cranky and they closed off the day with a sleepover and a movie night.

Clarke and Lexa cuddled that night, Jake forgotten and looking forward to the summer. And no idea of the curve ball life had planned for them.


	2. And so it begins...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meet Ms Nia.😊

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It begins.

Chapter 2.3

The delinquents stayed the weekend at their place before everyone went their separate ways. Octavia was going to visit her brother and boyfriend, a boy neither of the delinquents have met yet, in Paris. Raven was going off to maths and science summer bootcamp, before starting

Murphy and Emori were going to a cabin in the woods together for a month. Monty, Ace, Jasper and Harper were going on a road trip for the summer. 

Her and Lexa had made vacation plans for the summer. Abby would join them for the first two weeks before she came back for work and they'd spend some alone time as a small family.

Of course the plans weren't set in stone yet, they had yet to pick the destination and buy plane tickets. Lexa was still trying to get things on track with her new building in Arcadia before they could start making the final decisions.

~~~~~

It was a Saturday. The weekend after her party with the delinquents. Clarke and Micah were sitting on the pool chairs out back. Clarke was in a white one piece, the top and the bottom held together by a gold ring that rested in the middle of her toned abdomen.

Abby was at work and Lexa had to rush to the office that morning for a conference. She'd be back by lunch and so her and her daughter were enjoying their time together.

Currently the little girl was babbling up a storm. Ever since she'd said her first word, the girl had been learning more and more vocabulary which both Clarke and Lexa found both amazing and sad. Their baby was growing up.

Micah had taken to calling Abby Nana and all their friends were "anny" and "unky" it was super cute. She'd also taken to asking, "wha that?" When she wants to know what something is, And "open" when she wants you to open something for her.

It was just amazing to witness the girl changing every single day. Growing and her little personality shining through. She absolutely loved it.

~~~~~

Her phone vibrated from where she had it resing face down on the table next to her pool chair. She reached for it, seeing the doorbell alarm she opened the front door camera app.

Standing at the other side of her door was a woman with dark hair in a pantsuit, next to her was a child holding a teddy bear and a teenager a bit behind her. She got up with Micah in her arms and went inside, making a beeline for the door. She grabbed a wrap around cloth on the living room couch and did her best to wrap it around herself while holding Micah.

The door sounded again and she yelled 'coming!' as she hurriedly walked to the door. 

"Hi, how may I help you?" She opened the door with a smile.

At the door stood the dark haired woman in the grey pantsuit holding a briefcase. Behind her stood the two people. The teenage girl looked to only be a few years younger than her and the little girl, hiding behind her leg couldn't possibly be older than seven years old.

"Hello, I am looking for a Miss Alexandria Woods?" The woman looked down at the notepad she was holding and up again.

"Umm, she's not here right now. I'm her wife, Clarke. Can I help you with anything?" She asked, confused.

"Yes, My name is Nia Queen, and I was hoping to discuss with Mrs Woods about her parents." She spoke up.

"Oh, she won't be home from work for a while." Clarke spoke confused.

"Could you maybe call her. It's urgent." She spoke impatiently.

"Umm, may I ask what this is about?" 

"I'm from social services and Mr Woods has been listed as a next of kin for a recently deceased lady in Ton DC. I was hoping to speak to her about that." 

"Okay, why don't you come in and I'll give her a call?" She steps aside, pulled the door wider and readjusting Micah on her hip.

She led the trio into the living room and got them situated on the couch before reaching for her phone on the table and exiting towards the kitchen.

She scrolled through her contacts and pressed her wife's name. 

The phone rang, and rang and no one answered. She tried her again a few more times and it went to voicemail. She was probably in a meeting but this shit was crazy and her wife needed to come home.

Next she looked for Lexa's office number and sure enough her wife's assistant answered.

"Mrs Woods office, Stacy speaking how may I help you?" 

"Stace!" She rushed out in relief.

"Clarke! Hey, how are you doing?!" She asked enthusiastically.

"Great actually. Do you know where Lexa is? She isn't answering her phone." She asked.

"Oh yeah, she's in a board meeting. Why?" 

"I really need to speak to her. Do you think you can get her the phone please. It's an emergency." She rushed out.

"Yeah sure. Just gimme a minute." 

And with that the hold jinggle started playing and she looked into the living room to find her three visitors still where she left them. The little girl cuddling close into the older one and the social worker scanning their house.

She adjusted Micha who was getting fussy and pinned the phone to her ear with her shoulder. She made a beeline for the fridge and got out a juice box for the little girl. Using both her hands she stabbed into the box with the straw and emptied the contents into a sippy cup. Closing it she gave it to Micah who grabbed for it at just the same moment as Lexa's rushed voice came through her phone.

"Baby are you alright? Is Micah alright? Did something happen?!"

"Baby! We're fine. But I need you to come home. Right now. It's an emergency. We have a social worker on our couch with two kids and she wants to talk to us about your parents. So I need you here. Please." She rushed out.

"I'm on my way." The phone went dead and Clarke threw hers on the counter top and dropped her head into her free hand and sighed. She ran a hand through her hair and exhaled. All she wanted was a relaxing pool day with her baby girl until her other baby girl came home, clearly that was never going to happen. Then, with a final deep breath, she turned toward the living room and left the kitchen.

"Sorry about that. She was in a meeting, but I got a hold of her and she's on her way." She smiled.

"Okay. Thank you." 

"Is there anything I can get for any of you while we wait?" She asked politely.

"No thank you, I'm alright." She looked towards the kids.

The older one shook her head and the younger one looked up, scared to ask but clearly wanting something.

"Can I get you anything sweetheart?" She asked the girl gently. She shyly looked down then up at her teenage companion, at the older girls nod she looked down again and then at Clarke.

"Water, please." She whispered, and Clarke smiled gently.

"Of course." She went to the kitchen and got the girl a cup of water and brought it back out. 

The moment she handed the little girl the cup Micah started getting fussy. She rocked the child gently but she wasn't having it, reaching for her top. A sign she wanted to feed. Clarke sighed and excused herself. 

She ran to the room and placed a whining Micah on the bed to get changed into a pair of sweats and a baggy tee quickly. She picked the girl up again and situated her on a nipple then carried the feeding child back to the living room to be with her guests.

She sat on a chair next to the long sofa the newcomers were perched on, and grabbed the feeding pillow next to it to get herself comfortable. She looked towards the girls and smiled.

"My name is Clarke. What are your names?" She asked gently at the frightened girls.

The little girl again looks at the older one, who Clarke suspects is her older sister, and at the nod she begins to speak.

"My name's Madi, this is Tari. She's my big sister. We do everything together. She says I'm annoying though." She pouts gently and Clarke can't help but smile. The older girl, Tari, huffs and rolls her eyes before continuing to ignore her surroundings.

"Well, Lexa thinks I'm annoying too. All the time." She giggles slightly.

"Really?!" She asks wide eyed.

"Yeap. Told me so herself even." The blonde smiles at the girls' innocence.

"But you're married." She mumbles, confused, and Clarke can't hold back a giggle. 

Her tiny face was pulling the same exact confused frown Lexa always had when she didn't understand something. It was off putting. And looking at the older girl now, she had the same expressionless face and most probably the same fear striking glare.

She could see the resemblance. The curly brown hair that frames Madi's face and the forest green eyes she's fallen so deeply in love with over the years.

What she couldn't understand was why these girls looked so much like her wife, not when they were both sure she had no siblings or living relatives. 

~~~~

Lexa came barreling into the house pulling her away from her thoughts. She stood carefully with Micah still nursing, the girl having fallen asleep on the nipple and let herself be brought into a quick hug and kiss by her wife.

Nia stood from where she'd sat and the girls stood too. Madi, back to being reserved and hiding behind her sister's leg.

"Mrs Woods, Nia Queen, pleasure to meet you." She said shaking the younger woman's hand briefly.

"Pleasure is all mine." Lexa looked really confused. "May I ask the purpose of your visit?" She asks politely.

"Of course. Is there somewhere we can speak privately?" She asks curtly and Lexa nods.

She leads Nia to her office, and Clarke sets the younger ones up with the TV and remote, then rushes to put Micah down in her room for a nap, and grabs the baby monitor then follows after them.

~~~~

"I am here to speak about your parents." Nia started as she took the offered seat in the office.

Clarke closed the door behind her so they wouldn't be overheard and sat on the plush couch near the desk where the other two women sat.

"What about my parents? They died five years ago in an accident." She sat ramrod straight in her chair, jaw clenching, Clarke assumed was from the emotions rising at the mention of her parents.

"Well mostly your father." 

Lexa continued to look at the woman in silence, waiting for her to continue.

"The girls outside. Their mother's body was found in a ditch after she was reported missing from her work at the filling station at 2am on Saturday morning. She got in a car after clocking off and was never seen again. 

Police are still investigating the case. They suspect murder." Both girls breathed a silent gasp.

"Their mother Percy was their only known relative. That is until we found letters of Percy, corresponding with one Alexander Woods.

The letters are private. They speak of missing each other and how the kids are doing. Letters written as one would write to their lover.

In one such letter, Percy tells Mr Woods of her pregnancy with Madi. And how much she wishes her girls could grow up knowing their father like you did.

This we have deduced that he is-was their father and thus making you their half sister. Only known relative, thus by default, their guardian."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do hope you enjoyed it and somewhat like where this might potentially be going.
> 
> I really did my best editing wise but it's hard to edit with a 3 year old always demanding you look at one thing or another😒. Fuck Auntying is tiring, I do not know how those of you who are parenting do it🙌.
> 
> That said all mistakes were my own and if they bother you too much just tell me about it if I've missed one and I'll fix it.


	3. Guardians

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let's meet the children shall we?  
> Also why are grown up things complicated?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just got done writing a big chapter, and I think I might have underestimated my Angst a bit👀

Chapter 3.3

Their guardian

The words rang through Lexa's ears, bouncing within the walls of her skull.

She had siblings. Not only that, she had siblings younger than her. Her father had cheated on her mother and now she had siblings she hadn't known about. 

She had so many questions, so many thoughts, so many feelings but no words to express any of them.

Clarke seemed to read her internal struggle and spoke up. She had no idea what they were saying but their lips moved so she let it happen.

"How old are they?" She heard Clarke ask at some point.

"Ontari is fourteen but acts like an eighteen years old. Madi is seven but has the intelligence of a twelve year old. They are amazing kids honestly. A little rough around the edges, they've had a hard life but they are amazing." Nia says gently with a soft smile.

Then everything sounded like a mess to her again. It felt like she was underwater and everyone around her was speaking a different language really.

She thought about all the times her father went on trips. How he'd say to her 'people need me Lex. You get me everyday but these ones only ever get me once in a while' then he'd kiss her forehead and smile at her pout. He'd kiss her mom on the forehead and hug her tight, the only times she'd ever see him so openly affectionate with the woman. She always looked sad when he left, but only on those occasions. Little Lexa never really understood why her mom got upset on those business trips and not all the others. Now she knew.

Because he wasn't really going on a trip. He was going to see them.

Then she remembers how lonely her childhood got sometimes and wondered why he hadn't just introduced them. Maybe things would have been better.

Now she has a teenager and a child to take responsibility for. Two people she had no idea existed that morning. Kids that have lost another parent, in the most painful way imaginable. Murder.

What on Earth was she going to do?...

~~~~~~~~~~

"You never did say where they lived before now" Clarke inquired.

She could tell her wife was having a mental battle, processing and digesting. And she was going to give her the time to do that by asking everything she needed to know in the moment.

"They lived in a run down apartment complex in Azgeda" she spoke up.

Azgeda is a town next to Trikru. It is mostly known for its low cost of living. It's run down infrastructure and last but not least, it's bucket loads of crime. It was basically what one would get if they took an asylum, full of deranged psychopathic people, and set them free in a town with very slack law enforcement.

Most of the people there were running from the law or had run in with it at some point in their lives. Drugs flew freely, gang rivalries at its best and murder was just a sport. So really, it was safe to say there would be no justice for Percy.

"How are the girls doing? I mean with that much exposure to that type of environment for most of their lives." Clarke was snapped out of her reverie by the sound of her wife's voice, thick with emotion but steady.

"We had them checked over, by a pediatrician and a child psychologist. So far it's what we expected. Slight malnutrition, dehydration. Not very good hygiene but they are well mannered for the most part. Ontari is a bit of a firecracker though. Mentally for the most part they are alright, they do have some trauma but overall it seemed like Percy did a great job of keeping the kids out of the life that occurred outside their four walls. They were homeschooled too, I guess she didn't want the outside world to influence who her children would become for the most part." She concluded opening her briefcase and removing a file she slid across the table towards Lexa.

"Everything about that is in this envelope. This is your choice. If you would not like to get custody of them I can place them in foster care." Lexa looked considerate.

"Will they get to stay together?" She finally spoke up.

"I'm not very sure on that front really. With how tough it is to find placements that are willing to take in two children in one go it might be harder than really anticipated." Nia looked apologetic and Lexa sighed glancing towards her wife who looked right back at her.

"Can we get a moment to sidebar?" Clarke spoke up.

"Sure, go ahead" the older woman smiled gently. 

Clarke and Lexa excused themselves and walked across the room and out towards Clarke's art room. They closed the door behind themselves and Lexa plopped herself on the art stool that sat in front of an unfinished painting of their little family, that might potentially be getting bigger depending on how this conversation went.

"So what are we thinking? Where is your head at on this?" Clarke asked.

"I really don't know. We have to take them baby. They've been abandoned enough. They're orphans like me but they didn't grow up with wealth surrounding them like I did. If we don't take them in they're going to get split up and I don't like the idea of that." Clarke listened and nodded.

"I know, I get where you're coming from but baby… we're kids. We're new to this whole parenting game, Micah is years away from her teenage rebellion years. I thought we had more time, are we really ready to take in a teenager and a seven year old? We're just teenagers ourselves…" Lexa pulled her to stand between her legs and leaned into her, Clarke wrapped her arms around her wife gently.

"I know my love… I know. But they are my siblings, and would it really be any different than having a toddler? We don't really know what we're doing with Micah but we try our best everyday, why can't we do that for them too? We have the space, the money, the love. So why not give it a try?" Clarke sighed and leaned more into the hug she was having with her wife. She needed this contact, they both did, it gave them reassurance that they had each other. They could face anything together, and they would, forever and ever.

\------

The grown ups had left them in the living room. The blonde one had been holding a child when they walked in, the baby looked cute but she looked really young, barely out of her teenage years, young, Ontari could tell. She was confused when she saw them, wearing a cloth over a swimming costume so they probably had a pool, which didn't really shock her with how big their house was. 

When Miss Nia had told them she found their sister, she anticipated a college student living in maybe a tiny apartment because she knows their dad was rich, mom always said so. She was not, however, expecting the large house that was, borderline, a mini mansion, in a white picket fence neighborhood. Nor was she expecting a blonde girl with a baby. She didn't look like their sister. She was really pretty though.

Turned out the girl was not their long lost sister but their sister's wife. That was big, mom was not really a big fan of the LGBT community. She never really vocalised it but she could see the contempt when they came across something gay. She would not like this house, that's for sure. There were pride flags scattered around the house accompanied by the lesbian and bi flags here and there. Something Ontari knew a lot about but would never admit to. Especially since mom never liked them reading or just being associated with it. 

She had brought home a gay self help book from the library by accident once. It had been in the cover flap of a different novel and she'd thought it was the one she brought for Ontari to read only for Ontari to find out three pages in that it was an LGBT book. Of course she had to read it then. It brought a lot of things to light for her. She'd read it over and over again and when it was time to return them and mother asked what the book was about she gave some bullshit storyline based on the blurb and never told a soul about what the book was really about.

Her 'sister' arrived a while later looking rushed and heading straight to her wife, Clarke, to make sure she was alright, it was cute. The girl had rushed to get changed from her swimsuit before the brunette arrived which Ontari was thankful for, and was now breastfeeding the baby. They were sitting in the large living room, the girl, Alexandria, who wore a suit (she didn't know women could do that), greeted Miss Nia who asked to talk in private and she agreed, leading them off towards the right side of the house. Clarke switched on the huge wall TV in front of them and handed Ontari the remote after putting on some show she assumes is kid friendly. Very presumptuous of her to assume they knew how to work a TV remote.

The adults disappeared for a while, it was an hour later when she heard the door to the room they were in open and close then another door open and close. Fifteen minutes from there a door opened and closed and then the one they'd originally went into. Ontari peeked over the couch to see her 'sister' and her wife walk back into the other room, holding hands.

She wondered then what her life would have been like had she grown up with her father and his wealth. To have been raised in a big house in the suburbs. To have the white picket fence family and the public school friends. She supposed she would be an entirely different person, and most possibly so would her relationship with her little sister, but she liked who she was and how close she was with Madi. So she scratched that thought as fast as it had appeared.

From the moment Miss Nia had told them that they had a sister, Ontari fantasized about what she would be like. If she would take in two children a woman she'd never met claims to be her sister's or would she turn them away and have them thrusted into foster care. Ontari supposes the situation isn't ideal but is it fair, to be expected to raise two children when you are barely an adult yourself? Besides they had a child to look after, no one in their right mind would risk the safety of their child like that. So really she would understand if they got sent to foster care, if they couldn't take them in. 

At the end of the day it didn't really matter how much money you had, raising a child is hard. She would know, she practically raised Madi. So they would go to their foster home and she'd do her best to explain to Madi that they couldn't take them, not because there was something wrong with them but because they are barely even grown ups themselves. Madi won't understand she knows that but she hopes at least she won't take it as something being wrong with her. She can just hope they don't get separated before she can have that groundbreaking conversation with the girl.

"Tari…" the little girl shook her from her musings.

"Yeah?" She answered looking down into worried eyes.

"Do you think they'll take us?" She asked gently.

"I don't know… but if they don't, you need to understand that they are probably kids just like us. And taking in an orphan is hard work, let alone two." She says running a hand through the younger girl's hair.

"What do you mean it's hard work?" 

"Well having your own child isn't easy but taking in an orphan, you have to get home checks, have to follow strict rules and stuff like that. It's hard work. Harder than most feel it's worth." 

"But they have the money, don't rich people get what they want? All they have to do is give us a bed. The government gives them money to feed us and buy us clothes and stuff so it's not like they'll have to waste money on us…" Madi reasoned.

"It's more than that Mads… they'll be taking responsibility for us. Anything we do will reflect on them, and especially if they haven't adopted us. It's complicated." How on earth was she supposed to explain their predicament to a seven year old.

"Why do grown up things have to be so complicated? Why can't they be as easy as picking what to have for breakfast." She huffed leaning into Ontari more and the older girl chuckled.

"I don't know Mads" a bout of silence.

"Tari?" 

"Yeah Mads?" She answers head rested on the back of the couch staring at the expensive looking ceiling.

"I hope they take us…" she whispers into her side, TV long forgotten, never even paid attention to really.

"Me too Mads… me too"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hate to be like I think I'm going to post once a week because I personally hate having stories I read updated once a week but damn.
> 
> I'm thinking longer chapters but I might alternate to once a week on one week and two on another depending on length of the chapter. What do you guys think?


	4. First impressions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa has her first conversation with her siblings.
> 
> Mostly a filler before a very plotty chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It has been brought to my attention that I had introduced an Ontari in one of the previous books. Honestly, I had forgotten, not going to lie, but then I realized it adds character. How often do you meet people with the same name and different characters in your life? OFTEN so I figured why not..
> 
> This Ontari is completely different from that Ontari, they are two completely different people.

Chapter 4.3

The meeting had run on longer than anticipated. Micah woke up from her nap and Clarke excused herself to go get her. The little girl was bouncing when she saw that Lexa was home and the older girl reached for her daughter and hugged her close. She used the child as a hold on reality and her sanity.

They discussed how things would go, the girls having made the decision to take the girls in. They drew up a plan of action and timeline. Something that helped put the girls at ease, mostly Lexa since knowledge calmed her. They'd take a couple of days to get to know the girls before they would get to really live with them. Well a couple of days was really six because that's when their temporary placement concluded. After the sixth day it will be either they take them in or they get separated. It didn't leave room for much really.

Lexa was obviously going to take time off work to help set up the rooms. They needed to start figuring things out, talk to Abby, get themselves mentally prepared to have to raise a child and a teenager alongside a toddler. Fuck this is not where they imagined either of their lives heading. Safe to say Lexa would be seeing her therapist sooner than agreed upon. At least this was all happening going into the summer. It gave them time.

Once everything was settled Lexa asked if she could talk to the girls, her 'sisters' considering she doesn't think she uttered a word to them from the minute she entered the house. She figured she might as well tell them what's going to happen, it regarded them after all and she hated it when grown ups made decisions that directly affected her and never discussed them with her as a kid. Those kids are smart from what she has heard so she thinks they'll understand this more than people give them credit for.

They go to leave the room, Micah still in Lexa's arms tucked under her chin into her neck. She walked to the living room, her wife and the social worker following. Then paused at the end of the hallway to take a breath and gather her bearings, they looked at her and she could see the similarities. They had her eyes, her father's eyes, well apparently their father's eyes. And they looked a lot like her. That was such a weird concept to her, she had spent so many years alone then to suddenly have someone say she had siblings, she couldn't quite wrap her head around it.

Clarke put a gentle reassuring hand on the small of Lexa's back, the girl visibly relaxed a bit then took the first step into the room. The younger girl's, her sisters -she'd have to get used to saying that at some point, tracked her movement across the room, it unnerved her a bit but this entire situation in itself was unnerving. They walked over and she pushed the round table closer to the couch the girls were sitting on, with her foot and took a seat opposite them on top of it.

"Umm, hey" she tried to smile.

\-------

The adults were in the room for a while, especially after her 'older sister', she would have to get used to that, and her wife returned to the room. Madi was dozing off next to her and she was absent mindedly looking at the large television screen perched on the wall in front of her. She has no idea what she is even watching but it's caught her attention and really it would be sad for her if Alexandria didn't take them in because she wouldn't get to finish whatever it is she's watching. Maybe her next foster home will have a TV, she doubts it'll be this huge but hopefully they'll let her watch it and she can find this weird thing she is watching.

A handle jiggled and the door the grown ups disappeared into was pulled open. She gently nudged Madi who had her head on her shoulder, the younger girl's head rolled forward then snapped up in attention. Eyes wide and suddenly alert, after scanning the place quickly, her body relaxed back into the soft leather of the couch. Ontari wanted to laugh, Madi did love her sleep, instead she settled for a small smile.

Alexandria walked out first, the baby was in her arms. She had previously seen the blonde girl, Clarke -she reminds herself, exit the room and re enter it with their baby in tow. Following her are her Wife and Miss Nia, and she exudes dominance and Ontari can definitely see her running a company. It suits her. Before her mind could run away with her Alexandria pushes the fancy glass table in the middle of the room closer to the couch they're sitting on and stops it a little ways in front of it. How the older girl manages that whilst carrying a child is beyond her comprehension. But she does, then takes a seat on the table facing them. 

'Why does she still look so intimidating with a child in her arms?' Ontari inwardly huffs.

"Umm, hey" the older girl tried to smile, but it looked forced.

Madi pushed harder into her side, their 'sister' seemed to notice and her stature softened a bit. Her eyes gleaming with sympathy, maybe pity, but her smile turned a bit more genuine. She cleared her throat.

"My name is Lexa. Well, Alexandria, but I prefer Lexa. I'm sure you already met my wife, Clarke, and our daughter Micah. 

It has come to our attention that, well I'm your only living relative and well by default your legal guardian, should we choose to accept."

The first thought that crossed Ontari's mind was, 'they can't take us', and really she's not that surprised. Of course they wouldn't want the burden of two more people. She's prepared to kneel, beg them to take Madi at least. She can handle whatever life throws at her as long as she knows Madi is okay and well taken care of. But before she could open her mouth in preparation to utter a word, the older girl continues, seemingly oblivious to Ontari's internal struggle.

"And we accept. But it's going to have to take a bit of a transition period. We are going to take a few days to get to know each other. No one likes living with people they don't know." She jokes.

"Then in six days Clarke and I will come pick you up at your foster home and get you moved in. It's going to be tough, and maybe we won't always get along but I look forward to finding out." Alexandria, Lexa concluded.

Madi looked at Ontari and the teenage girl looked at their 'older sister' eyes narrowed, then she looked to Clarke, who smiled gently and then to Miss Nia who smiled encouragingly. Ontari then looked down at Madi whose eyes shone with something she hasn't seen since their mother started being distant, Hope. She sighed and looked back at the brunette waiting patiently for an answer. She nodded slightly in greeting. It was enough of a signal for Madi though.

"It's nice to meet you Lexa!" Madi besides her spoke up.  
"My name is Madi, and this is Ontari. She doesn't talk much." Ontari huffed besides her but stayed quiet. 

Madi shot out her hand to give Lexa a hand shake, to which Lexa, very bewilderedly shook and smiled at the girls' strong grip.

"That is a mighty strong grip you have there Madi." Lexa smiled gently.

"'Tari says daddy used to say that a handshake is your first impression of other people and theirs of you, so you must make it strong to show that you are just as strong-"

"That way people take you seriously." Lexa finished for the girl, eyes clouded over. The older girl seemed to catch herself and shook her head, offering a brittle smile.  
"Yes, I suppose he did say that quite often." 

Well there was no way Ontari could deny relations to this girl now. Not that she could chalk up the eyes, the hair and the looks to coincidence but the fact that she knew things her dad, 'their' dad used to say, just confirmed it really. What was she expecting though? Of course she knew that, the man raised her. Was there for every birthday, recital and PTA meeting. Which is far more than Madi and her ever got in the bi annual two week stretches she'd get to see him for. It wasn't fair.

Why did they get to get the scraps of his love? Why had he brought her into a life like the one her mom worked so hard to maintain for her. 

Yet sitting across her, holding a child of her own, sat her older sister. A sister that hadn't known they existed. A sister that got raised in wealth and a happy family. One that knows not of the struggles of sleeping on an empty stomach, of being confined to the same tiny apartment day after day. Raising a child whilst still a child yourself, all the while trying to teach yourself to write because Mother could only be bothered to teach you the basics.

"You are not an Idiot Ontari, God's that the only thing your father ever did give you was his brain. So figure it out. I've taught you enough have I not?" She dismissed her with a wave, when she asked if she could teach her.

She had figured it out in the end, even taught Madi all she knows. But it wasn't fair that all her dad had given her was her brain. Why couldn't she be like Lexa and have gotten the loving home and wealth too?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also I figured out a posting schedule, twice a week and once a week.
> 
> This week I posted on Monday and Saturday. Next week it's Wednesday. Then the following week it's twice and so on and so forth.


	5. Interlude; Ashes Ashes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let's get to know Lexa a little bit shall we?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shit's about to get complicated. 
> 
> Brace yourself for some mind fucking. I can confidently say that almost every chapter I've written starting with this one has given me a headache 😂. 
> 
> Enjoy my pain!

Chapter 5.3

There was no way Lexa could deny that the girls really were her siblings. And even if she could deny it, there would be no point. Anyone who took even a quick look at both girls would have to double take at how much they looked like her. 

But the cherry on top of the cake is the fact that they know her father's most iconic sayings. She remembers the first time she even heard him tell her that. It was on the first take your children to work day that she was actually going to go to work with him.

****

Father was still refusing, even with much persuading from Mother and countless long days of dropping hints, subtle and not so subtle. Lexa had even turned to begging at some point in time. Father just would not budge. This was the fifth year of 'take your child' to work day and all the other four had resulted in her going to work with mother at her office as a psychologist. Which was not as fun as you would think considering she couldn't really do anything but sit in the waiting room while mother was in sessions. Mother had worked with father at the beginning of his career while working on her Masters and PhD, that was actually how they met. So she taught her a lot about the company, but only the basics, claiming she could only teach her the nooks and crannies if Father agreed. She would however take her out for pizza and ice cream after so that was always nice.

Alas Father would never agree to it. Whenever she asked he would chuckle lightly, pet her gently on the head and say 'maybe when you're a bit older'. She was TWELVE now, surely she was old enough. But father just would not listen and it frustrated her. With all the extra classes she has been taking on business management and anything related to money she could find since she was EIGHT, surely by now he would deem her old enough. She has worked so hard for this, and this year she will not take no for an answer.

With that set and decided, Lexa hopped off her bed and marched, determined, to her father's study room. She hesitated for a second before she steeled her resolve and knocked. A muffled 'come in' sounded and she made quick work of turning the knob and pushing the heavy door open.

Her father was sitting in his large leather chair behind his oak desk, surrounded by mountains of paper. He looked up from where he was writing something with his sleek fountain pen and smiled gently at the girl.

"Can I help you Alex?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Actually father, we can help each other." She started, hands connected behind her, back ramrod straight and face blank. Taking a stance that makes her feel powerful, like father had taught her. It gave her confidence and demanded attention.

Her father put his pen down and crossed his fingers on top of the paper he was working on on the desk, eyebrow raised. He made a 'continue' gesture and waited with a stoic face.

"I have been reading anything there is to read, took every online course I could possibly find, and talked to a lot of business owners, small and otherwise, including your CFO, about anything and everything in regards to running a business and a company effectively since I was EIGHT.

I have watched every movie, documentary, youtube video and informational clips I could find in any platform. Listened to self help podcasts with methods for success. Studied the history and everything there is to possibly know about your company. Revised strategies on how to take the company to the next level, went over them so many times there is no possible way of them failing.

I have an entire schedule that is set around being a CEO, grafted from your personal schedule and those of other successful business people. All the while, being ahead of my class in my studies and maintaining an all A report card.

Even through that I have found a way to keep my social life more or less intact. I have friends, and I make time to be a child. I do these things not only because I want to but because your company will become my company and I want to be prepared.

So really, all you are doing is depriving me the hands on knowledge I need to effectively plan better strategies. You are also depriving your only daughter of the father daughter quality time she needs to form secure attachments." She smirks slightly, and father's eyes seemed to darken at the last statement.

"Bottom line Father, is that I believe I have worked hard and earned the right to see the inner workings of the company. I have dedicated the better part of four years to learning and bettering myself. You know that. Alas I am beginning to think the company shall not be falling to me, thus maybe all my hard work is for nothing and I should cease it, enjoy my youth.

So you see father, you let me go to work with you, I learn more about the company and you get to rest happy knowing it will be in great hands when it is mine. That way we both win, but deprive me of my knowledge then really, I might begin to believe I am not trusted with the future company. I will return to my childhood with vigour and you lose an heir, and the best candidate you have to take over, in which you have a win lose situation, where you lose and I know you hate losing. But really it is up to you." 

She watched her father's face clearly, and she swore she saw a ghost of a smile. He did not budge, did not make a move to speak and even if he was about to, she did not give him a chance.

"I shall be waiting for your response. If there is none then I shall assume your decision has been made. I bid you Good day father." She did a half bow and turned to walk out the door, closing it behind her.

When she got into the hallway and away from father's prying eyes she finally released the breath she was holding. Leaning against it she slid to the floor, her hands were shaking and her heart beating erratically. She had actually done that. She closed her eyes and leaned her head on the wall, taking a few deep, steadying breaths.

Her heart rate calmed and breathing even, hands stable and adrenaline crashed Lexa pushed herself off the ground and from the wall, making a beeline for her room. Once there she plopped onto her bed, in the privacy of her room, she proceeded to squeal into her pillow in disbelief.

She went in there and stood up to father. Gave him an ultimatum. She was equal parts proud and goddamn shaken. What if he didn't take her? Then she really would stop her compact schedule and be a child. Sometimes she found herself wishing she had no expectations on her back, but she quite enjoyed having a grown-up schedule. She enjoyed the things she learned and liked that she always felt so accomplished at the end of the day.

Sure her life could be school, eat, play, sleep repeat like the children at school and some of her friends. But that is not a thing she wants for herself. She will resort to it though if Father does not live up. Just like he told her, when you issue a threat, always be prepared to follow through. It was a thing she told her when she confessed she was being bullied at her new school. Before she made any friends.

They had transferred her to public school and she had insisted she wanted a new wardrobe. But instead of going to the high end stores she is sure mother wanted, she got her clothes from Goodwill and left a sizable donation in her wake. She had recently read about their role in the community and wanted to aid it.

When she got to the school, the kids bullied her for the clothes when someone noticed the shirt she was wearing once belonged to them. She did not care to tell them her backstory, it was none of their business. So she let it happen for a bit, until they decided that her ignoring them wouldn't pass and turned violent. Shoves into the lockers, a punch to her shoulders by anyone willing. Then she decided she needed help, but she needed to deal with things like, as society would put it, 'a man'. 

So she asked father and he said stand up for yourself, issue a warning, followed by a threat, tell them what you will do if they do not back down and if they don't, you follow through. To solidify it he had said those exact words, 'when you issue a threat always be prepared to follow through', when she asked what if she did not wish to hurt anyone. She nodded sharply and looked up at the stars from their perch on the porch outside.

The next day at school, she stood up to her biggest bully and his crew, they seemed to think it funny and believed her to be joking. So when he made to hit her she sidestepped and put as much weight as she could behind her punch and knocked him out cold. She then turned and walked away, everyone parting to give her leeway. No one from that day on had ever laid a hand on her or regarded her with nothing but respect ever again, and she would take nothing but respect because that is what she gave to other people.

So just like that situation, where she issued a threat and followed through, she has issued this threat, and if she was not taken seriously she will follow through. 

A knock sounded as one of the help peeked a head in and told her dinner was ready. She thanked them and watched as they pulled the door closed behind them.

With her resolve steeled again, she left the room and went for dinner. Her face was impassive during dinner, smiled respectfully, chuckled when needed to and talked when spoken to. Mother at this point realised that her people were off, Father hadn't done much talking either. When she was about to ask, Lexa asked about how horseback riding went and off she was again on a tangent.

Mother was anything but a woman from humble beginnings. She had been humbled by life though, hence why she chose psychology, and as easy going and carefree as she was, she enjoyed the finer things in life. Which had in turn resulted in the house being what one could describe as posh. Lexa though took after Father, they cared little for money or what I could get you. 

Speaking of, she took that opportunity to study her father's face. He looked preoccupied, and had his thinking face on. Lexa smiled slightly and hid it by taking a fork of food to her mouth. He was considering her proposition, probably. She hoped.

Once dinner was over and the dishes in the dishwasher as was her chore, she went into the hallway to head to her bedroom for bed. There were two days till the day, and that gave him a day and a half to think about her words.

\-----

He stopped her in the morning on her way to school, his agreement was curt. He patted her shoulder and smiled down at her.

"Your request has been granted" he smiled and ran a gentle hand in her hair. Her father was a kind man but he was not known to be affectionate and gentle. At least not with her or Mother. 

Lexa was left speechless, a wide smile broke through her face and she fist pumped the air. Finally pulling into an excited dance behind his retreating figure. She was finally going to go to work with him, a squeal sounded and she had to contain herself. She was going to be late, her friends probably already waiting for her at their meetup spot to cycle to school together.

She made quick work of hopping onto her bike and going as fast as she could to their spot. No one knows what her parents do for a living, her friends know her mother is a psychologist and her father runs a business. But she has taken great measures to ensure their riches do not impede or influence her social life too much. That and she uses her mother's last name on school premises. So as far as they are concerned Alex Woods and Lexa Sky are two completely different people.

"You're late Sky!" Genevieve stated as she came to a halt next to them.

"Sorry! But I have news, Father is finally taking me to work with him!" A round of cheers sounded, they knew her struggle.

"Finally!" Violet screeched, ever her biggest supporter.

"It still weirds me out that you call your dad 'Father'. What are you, Posh?" Anya snarked, and the group rolled their eyes.

She was really the only one in her friend group that wondered why Lexa was so elusive. And she has said so on multiple occasions, but thankfully their group of friends always came to her rescue. Urging the girl to lay off her, the brunette was immensely thankful for their friends.

"Not everyone can be a mommy's girl An" she stuck out her tongue to the girl who just rolled her eyes.

"Let's go, or we'll be late. And I refuse for any of you to make me late." Lincoln stated before climbing back on his bike and starting in the direction of the school.

Everyone followed suit and it turned into a race, one that Genevieve won because she was an aspiring professional cyclist. So really this was her turf. All of her friends were aspiring to be something hence why she loved them all so much.

Lincoln was an aspiring artist, his creations gorgeous and already exhibited in small shows. Anya, a chef, she could cook her way into your heart, everything she makes tastes like magic and is already well on her way to mastering pastries. Violet, a florist, she had an entire greenhouse in the back of her home and all the plants are thriving. Her garden was truly something to behold, all vibrant and healthy. She wanted to open her own flower shop, and she was really the sweetest human ever.

They were a small group of self proclaimed child prodigies. Not entirely self proclaimed though but they weren't one to brag. And it helped every one of them to have friends that had goals and we're working towards them too.

School was about as exciting as school could get. Her excitement for going to work distracted her more than she realized but she could not be bothered to really care. She really just couldn't wait.

\----- 

The day was finally here, she had woken up at her usual time, done her reading, meditation, yoga and exercise. Then her journaling and listening to a motivational podcast for the day. Took a shower, got dressed and headed down for breakfast.

Father found her drinking her hot chocolate, a replacement for coffee, and doing the days crossword puzzle, as he always did. Her breakfast was long consumed. She looked up and gave a smile, one that was gently returned.

"Good morning Father" she said, going back to her puzzle.

"Good morning Alex" he replied, taking his seat at the table, as his breakfast was brought to him.

They sat in silence, Mother joined them at some point and when her breakfast was complete, travel coffee mugs in hand for both her parents, they all headed out the door. Goodbyes were exchanged, Mother gave her a strong hug and wished her luck with a forehead kiss. She got into Father's car backpack at her feet and they made their way to his company office.

He could see her nervously fidgeting from her passenger side seat, and Father chuckled softly. 

"It is okay to be nervous Alex. Completely normal even, this is your first day meeting people that may very well someday work for you." He reassured her.

"I know, I just wish to make a great first impression." She sighed, deflating a bit.

Father seemed to ponder a little, then when they stopped in the parking lot of a massive building, he turned to her.

"The first impression of yourself you are going to give to anyone you meet is your greeting. A strong handshake means a strong character. Do you understand what I am trying to say?" He asked gently.

"No father, I do not believe I do." She shook her head.

"What I mean to say is a handshake is your first impression of other people and theirs of you, so you must make it strong to show that you are just as strong that way people take you seriously." 

At that Lexa nodded, still unsure.

"Here let us practice" he suggested, reaching out his hand for a shake.

"Only you would want to practice a handshake Father." She chuckled, but reached her own hand, gratefully.

For a few long minutes she practiced the art of a perfect handshake. Not too light or people will think you weak and malleable. Not too tight or they might take it or you as forceful and a threat. But just strong enough it demands respect and weak enough to show you respect them too. A balance.

Once they were inside the first person she met was one of the company's board members. Father had introduced her as his daughter and heir. He looked perplexed, and his demeanor rather displeased at the sight of her.

She reached out her hand and he took a moment to just watch it and she watched him, not making any moves to drop it but raising an eyebrow at him in condescending question. He looked to her Father who was undoubtedly paying attention although he seemed to be 'preoccupied' by his phone. Then did he reach out his hand in reciprocation.

"Charles Pike, a pleasure to meet you." He grumbled through a forced smile. 

His handshake was rather forceful and hard but she did not let him lead it. Taking control of it steadily and showing him she was not to be played with. His eyes seemed to register the energy it was giving out and he swallowed, releasing her hand rather quickly. 

"The pleasure is all mine. Father has told me a lot about your work in the promotion of agriculture as a way to sustain people of lower income. It is rather interesting, maybe we should get together soon to discuss it." She smiled kindly.

When in fact she knew the project most probably had nothing to do with the less fortunate and was probably a face to hide something else. She'd read a lot about him, and he is the sketchy type, and will be the first board member to go when she inherits the company. But for now, she is playing nice.

"Umm, of course." He looked to her father perplexed and Father looked just as shocked as he did but only for a split second.

"Let us move on then Alex. Charles I will be seeing you in the board meeting later." They bid their farewells and off they went to meet the next person.

A great impression behind her belt and father thoroughly confused Lexa left that day with an impressed Father and perplexed Board members. She knew things Father hadn't about each and everyone one of them. About the company and even knew the names of all the heads of department. A meeting was set up with everyone she knew she had something to learn from, and they all would be attended to.

With or without her father's presence. Neither mattered to her really.

"I hear you have set up meetings with my team?" It came out as more of a question than anything else really. They were in the car heading home at the end of the work day.

"Yes, I did." She answered.

"May I ask what about?" He inquired.

"Mostly about how they run things." She looked back out the window.

"Why do you concern yourself with matters of the office? You have a few more years before you have to start worrying about learning anything business related." He asked, perplexed.

"I like to know. I want to be prepared." She answered back. He sighed and shrugged, eyes on the road.

"For what it's worth, you will make a great addition to the company. I know you will do great things." 

With that silence befell the car, and Lexa travelled the rest of the way home with a smile plastered on her face.

*****

And he had been right, she had done great things with the company. But now, looking at the faces of the children before her. None of it really mattered. That memory felt tainted, wrong, he had known then. She wasn't the only child he had, she wasn't the only child he'd passed that nugget of wisdom onto. And the betrayal that surrounded that revelation threatened to crush her and everything she thought she knew about the man that sired him.

Abruptly, she stood and passed Micah on to Clarke. She nodded to Miss Nia and bid them farewell before making a beeline for the room she inhabits with Clarke. The younger girl shows the visitors out, arranging for Nia to do a house inspection the following day. She couldn't really hear the rest of what was said as she walked away, her ears rang and her chest burned. Finally in the confines of their room, Lexa allowed herself to crumble to the ground as a sob crawled its way up her throat leaving pain and ash in its wake.

Clarke found her there moments later, and she held on tightly to her wife. Who was trying and albeit failing to hold on to all the pieces of her shattering reality.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this I feel is the turning point of this book. Remember how I said the tone might change as we go forward? Well we have reached the change.
> 
> Tell me what you think. Have I elevated it elegantly or just threw it in the dumpster like hot garbage? Lol


	6. Hold me while I break

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa hurts, Clarke hurts too. Some cuteness and some feel good spice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is some sexual content in this chapter.  
> If you are not a fan just skip starting from "Lexa was nervous..." It's the last scene and it's just fluff anyway so you're not missing anything.
> 
> Let me know if you think there should be more smut in this story or if you just dont see that do them.

Chapter 6.3 

Clarke had no idea what to do. Her Lexa, her strong, brave and proud Lexa was curled in on herself into a ball in her arms. Holding on so tightly to her as if afraid that if she let go for just a second the younger girl would wither away and everything would have been one long dream.

She couldn't help but cry with her. Micah, having slid out of her grasp allowing her to use both hands to hold on to her wife, toddled to be able to see her Mama properly. The little girl whined to see her Mom crying and fell between them in the cuddle, holding onto Lexa too. Clarke wrapped her hands around both her girls and breathed. 

Not to say Lexa never cried. She has many times in fact, Clarke has held her through a few panic attacks, stressed sobbing and even parental breakdowns ever since Micah was in their lives. So she knows her wife cries, but not like this.

Why did this have to happen to Lexa? Why now? She was finally happy, finally sure that her parents were proud of the person she had become. So sure in herself and her identity. Now a wrench the size of two children and an unfaithful deceased father, was thrown so far in their well oiled machine it would take a while to remove. If ever really.

The blondes heart ached, ached for her wife, the pain this was causing her. Ached for her sisters in-law, orphaned and unknowing of the cruel world around them. For their daughter who is having to witness a breakdown of one of her parents. 

Her phone sounded and she guessed it was her mother finally getting home. She doesn't understand how long it had been with her in that position. Lexa had fallen asleep, but fresh tears leaked from her closed eyelids and Clarke felt her heart shatter. Micah had also fallen asleep at some point, thumb in her mouth, an emotional crutch she had developed as a baby but only used when really upset as a toddler.

She could hear her mother call to them, the woman finally made it to their room and stopped by the door, worried. Clarke looked up, fresh tears pricking at the corners of her eyes.

"Mommy" her voice cracked and Abby was next to her in a heartbeat, bag thrown haphazardly and arms holding her daughter's face, inspecting.

Once she was sure she wasn't hurt, physically at least, she looked over to her daughter in-law and couldn't help but worry more. Lexa was curled in on herself, in a fetal position, hands tucked under her chin, cheeks wet with a continuous flow of tears even though she looked to be sleeping. Her eyes rapidly moved under closed lids. She tucked her side deeper into Clarke who was kneeling next to her, Micah was tucked into Lexa's front but still in Clarke's arms, face buried in her chest and thumb in her mouth also fast asleep.

Abby wrapped her arms around Clarke and the girl shook with silent sobs. The older woman could feel her shoulder wetten with her daughter's tears. She couldn't help but wonder what on earth happened. When she left that morning for work they had been their usual happy selves, content to enjoy existing around each other. Teasing, laughing, gentle kisses being exchanged and tickle fights with Micah. She had left with her heart full and a few new pictures in her camera roll. 

She would get answers but for now, her daughters need her. Abby pulls away slowly and uses one hand to wipe at her daughter's face, the other still firmly wrapped around her shoulder. Then she made to stand up resulting in a pained whine from Clarke. Abby walked around and reached for the child nestled into her mother's belly, carrying her to the large bed and settling her in the middle surrounded by pillows. Then she went to help Clarke with Lexa, together they managed to maneuver the girl to the bed. Tucking her in next to Micah, Clarke gave her a pillow that smelt like her and they watched her curl around it, her tears already making a wet spot on the pillow case.

Abby watched Clarke walk over to the walk in closet and come out holding a new shirt. The one she was wearing she only now just realized had a large wet spot covering the major of her abdomen. She watched as the younger girl changed, using the tear soaked shirt to dry her stomach before pulling on the new one. Then they both exited the room. 

\----- 

They sat in the kitchen, both nursing cups of tea. Clarke looked so distraught, Abby couldn't help but be so worried. They hadn't spoken a word to each other since entering the kitchen and her resolve was slowly dissipating.

"Clarke?" She decided to bite the bullet. No answer, the girl's eyes seemed glazed over.

"Honey?" She tried again, the girl's eyes snapped to her.

"What is going on?" She asked gently.

"Lexa, umm. We had a visitor today, a woman by the name Nia Queen. She's a social worker." Clarke ran a hand through her hair with a sigh.

"Why was there a social worker here?" She was confused. "Are they trying to take Micah away? Because they can't do that, there is nothing you have done wrong. You two take such good care of her and have done nothing to put her in any kind of danger, so that doesn't make any sense!" 

"It wasn't about Micah." She rubbed her forehead. Abby released a sigh.

"If it wasn't about Micah, then what was she doing here?" Relief turned into confusion.

"She umm, she came over with two kids. Apparently they're her half siblings. From her dad. They just got orphaned, Lexa's their only known living relative.

Momma, you should have seen them. They look just like her. There's no denying the relation. You should have seen Lexa, after they left though." A fresh wave of tears sprung and the blonde sniffled.

"She crumbled mom. I have never seen her so broken, my strong Lexa. It broke my heart, I held her while she shook and cried. The love of my life was in pain, and all I wanted to do was take it away, Micah felt it, she was there for that.

Why did he have to do this to her? Hasn't she been through enough?" The blonde's head fell into her hands, a muffled sob sounded.

Abby stood quickly, tea forgotten and raced to get daughter's side. Engulfing her in a hug, the younger girl melted into the motherly embrace and let herself be held. When the younger girl regained her bearings she pulled away, her face pink and warm. She rubbed at her cheeks wiping her tear stains and then her eyes willing the tears to stop falling.

"I don't think I've cried this much since you and dad kicked me out." She tried to make a joke but Abby's face darkened and turned away. Clarke sighed, before she could say a thing Lexa appeared from around the corner.

"Hey baby," Clarke smiled at her wife. 

The older girl had changed out of the suit she had been placed in bed with. She was now wearing a loose tank top and track pants, her hair down. She held a fussing Micah in her arms, the girl probably hungry by now.

Abby watched her daughter stand, the girl went to grab a small container of self pureed food from the fridge and a baby spoon. Then she washed her hands, placing her wet cool hands in her cheek, probably trying to cool herself down. She then grabbed the food and headed to where Lexa was struggling to get Micah to sit on her high chair. The younger girl is undoubtedly clingy from witnessing both her mother's in distress.

In the end Lexa gave up and sat with Micah on her lap as Clarke worked on feeding her. They did so in silence, and Abby watched as they exchanged comforting touches. Both seeming to breathe a little easier with each touch exchanged.

\------

They only got around to talking about it when Micah went down for her last nap of the day before bedtime. They sat around the living room, Lexa and Clarke on the long chair cuddled closely together. Clarke on her back and Lexa laying on top of her with arms wrapped so tightly around her it was a marvel Lexa could still breathe.

There they explained everything, from the woman arriving to them leaving. Though they did leave out discussing the part of Lexa's breakdown. The girl was clearly still vulnerable from that and Clarke was doing her best to ground the girl.

"So, you're taking them in then?" Abby clarified.

"Yeah, we are." Clarke confirmed. She was the one who did most of the talking.

"Are you guys sure about this? You are both very young, no one would fault you if you did otherwise." She spoke up.

"What other choice do we have Abby? My father has already abandoned them enough as is. If we leave them, they will be split up, and they're all they have to each other. I owe them this much." Lexa spoke up.

"Lexa, honey, you do not owe those girls anything. You were not the one who had an affair with their mother, you did not lie about their existence for years. You did not even know they existed until a few hours ago. You are not at fault and this has never been your burden to carry." Abby reached a hand to squeeze her daughter in-laws calf, Lexa sniffled.

"It's not fair, every time I feel like I have gotten control of my life and everything is perfect, something always has to happen. He gets to be dead, and I get to deal with the messes he leaves behind. Why didn't he just tell me they existed?" Her voice tapered off. 

The room fell silent, no one knew what to say to that, so Clarke held on tighter to her wife as hot tears soaked into her shirt. Abby moves closer and rubbed gentle circles on her daughter in-law's back. It was settled then, she would be welcoming more in-laws into her family. She would treat them like her daughters, love them, care for them and help out where she could because being plain and honest. Clarke and Lexa have no idea what they have signed themselves up for.

\-----

That night, no one was really in the mood to cook after the day they had. So Clarke ordered pizza and Abby made a grocery store run for Lexa's favorite comfort food with Micah. They had dinner snuggled on the couch, Abby got Micah ready for bed and tucked in for the night. Then the young couple moved to the bedroom, taking the snacks with them. 

Once they were situated on the bed, Clarke pulled out the remote and pressed the button to reveal the TV, tucked behind the wall as part of the wall rolled up and the TV pushed forward. They picked a movie to watch and as it started playing the lights dimmed and the mood light turned on.

They dove into the chocolate chip ice cream first, with Clarke sitting against the headboard and Lexa tucked into her front head resting on her shoulder. 

"Do you really think we can handle a seven year old, a teenager and a toddler?" Clarke asked under her breath.

"I believe together we can do anything. Besides we did say we wanted more children in the future." Lexa turned her head to look at her wife.

"We did, didn't we. I just never expected our 'future' to be so soon, you know? I thought we had more time." She looked down at her wife.

"I know. Me too. I was really looking forward to going on vacation with you and Micah. Finally get some time away from all the drama, with your dad, finally finishing school and now this happens." The older girl fell silent and shoved another spoonful of ice cream in her mouth.

"Who says we still can't?" Clarke asked and Lexa looked perplexed.  
"Hear me out, what if after the girls get settled and we all get acquainted we just all go on holiday?" She proposed.

"Yeah, that would be nice, if things go right then why not. But baby we must also think about if things don't go as well as we expect? What then?" Lexa sighed, nudging her wife's warm neck with her cold nose, eliciting a shiver from the girl.

"Then we take it as it comes and find solutions as per the problem requires. You've said it yourself, together we can do anything." Clarke planted a kiss to her wife's forehead and the older girl sighed at the touch.

"What are we going to tell our friends?" Clarke spouted out of nowhere, and Lexa couldn't help but chuckle.

***** 

Lexa was nervous, and of course she had to be the anxious baker of the house. Nia was due to arrive at eight for the home inspection. So in true nervous Lexa fashion she had been up at five and had started causing a ruckus. Clarke no matter how hard she tried to ignore it she couldn't, and ended up tossing and turning in bed. So she had begrudgingly pulled herself out of bed at six. Dragged herself to the bathroom to wash her face and brush her teeth, then to the kitchen, eyes mostly closed and leaning heavily on any object she came across.

The moment her body sagged onto the barstool and splayed across the countertop she felt a warm mug be thrusted into her hands. The smell of delicious roasted coffee beans roused her body just enough to take the first sip and a moan left the girl's mouth. She heard Lexa release an involuntary whine from a few places away but could only muster a smirk with her eyes still closed. Once the mug was empty, she finally attempted to open her eyes and the sight that befell her was breathtakingly gorgeous.

Lexa was in the clothes she fell asleep wearing from yesterday, wearing her 'kiss the baker' pink apron, -a gag gift from Clarke last Christmas-, her unruly hair tied in a ponytail. She had flour on her hands, apron, track pants and neck. She even found a way to get more than a little in her hair. Her face was covered in the white powder and it accentuated the little freckles she had dotted across her nose and cheek. Her eyes seemed more vibrant in contrast with the paleness and the lighting enveloped her gorgeously. 

Clarke in that moment remembered why she fell in love with the gorgeous girl that is her wife in the first place. It only solidified more when said girl looked over her shoulder and smiled at her gently, eyes apologetic. 

"Sorry for waking you up." She whispered lovingly, as Clarke closed the distance between them and hugged her from behind.

"No need to be sorry. You know I can't sleep without you anyways." She kissed the exposed skin under her neck and her wife shivered.

Clarke took that moment as an opportunity and slid her hands under the apron in the front. Sliding them under her wife's shirt, she felt the warm skin jump at her touch. She dragged blunt nails across the ridges of the older girls six pack and the muscles tensed deliciously under her fingertips and Lexa whined.

Her right hand moved further up, but not before removing it to untie the apron. She cupped her wife's perky breast squeezing gently before teasing her nipple. Pulling it and rolling it between her fingers. Her wife moaned quietly against her and Clarke could feel a jolt of heat course through her to her core. 

"Clarke, please." The brunette whispered, floured hands grasping the countertop hard. Knuckles white.

"Please what baby?" She whispered into her ears, biting her lobe and sucking it into her mouth.

"Don't tease" she grunted, hips jolting, in need of friction. Her cock straining against her pants, hard and throbbing.

Clarke's left hand, that had been scraping gently at her pecs, finally made a move south. Her fingers danced under the hem of her wife's pants, teasing. Until finally the hand dipped in and her hand enclosed around the aching member. 

"Fuck baby, you're so hard for me already." She moaned her hips twitching as a gush of wetness coated her panties.

"Only for you" Lexa's head leaned forward, body hunching slightly and her hips began gyrating against her wife's warm hand.

Clarke thumbed at the bulbous head, feeling the wetness that was there she grunted. She worked her wife's cock, rubbing up and down, twisting her hand. All the while her other hand kneaded at the breast under it and her mouth found purchase on the older girl's neck, sucking and with the intent to leave a mark. Lexa groaned against her, her breathing becoming erratic and her precum leaking out faster, she was so close. The blonde was soaked, her walls twitching as her pussy closed around nothing, but this was not about her.

She moved her hand faster, wishing with all her might that she was sucking the girl off instead. Her wife was a whimpering now, a tell tale sign that she was close. She just needed a little push. Clarke bit down on the spot she was working on while simultaneously twisting and pulling on her wife's nipple and tugging a bit on her cock. That was all it took and Lexa was coming with a grunt and a terse 'Clarke'. 

Clarke worked her down slowly and gently. Her hand and pussy soaking, she was sure both would be dripping on the floor soon. She could feel her arousal running down her inner thigh at this point and squeezed her legs to alleviate some of the pressure. Once her wife had her breathing under control Clarke removed both her hands from her body, and brought her soaked one to her lips, moaning at the taste of her wife.

"Fuck, you always taste so good." She sighed, Lexa whimpered again watching her wife lick her cum from her hand, gulping in time with her swallows.

Once she had cleaned her hand, Clarke pulled the girl into her. The older girl's head resting on her shoulder. She sighed against her neck, body relaxed.

"I needed that." Lexa whispered, placing a gentle kiss to her wife's neck and Clarke swallowed a moan as her body shivered in response.

"I know you did baby." She squeezed her tighter.

"I love you." Lexa whispered.

"I love you too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was my first smut attempt, so tell me what you think. It wasn't hard core just soft and I think it kept in tune with the vibe of the book so far.

**Author's Note:**

> COMMEEEENNTTTT!! Please😁😂  
> Also drop a kudos if you like what you see and see what you like.😂


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